Moving Forward

It's been a whirlwind these past few weeks.  July 17th came, and with it, a stressful few days that mirrored the original diagnosis back in March.  The tumor measured significantly larger and the docs, not knowing what the growth was, ordered an immediate MRI and PET scan to try to figure it out.  The best outcome would be that the growth was necrosis of the tumor, meaning that the chemo worked and the death of the tumor was leading to a larger 'growing' mass of dead cells.  After extremely tense waiting, the MRI actually revealed that the large mass was in fact necrotic - a huge reason to celebrate.  However, it also revealed that there were several new smaller masses around the main mass that were consistent with malignancy.  Another tense 24 hours of waiting for the PET scan results also revealed some great news - that there was no peripheral disease, and that the lymph nodes in the chest wall and left axilla that had lit up at the pre-treatment scan were no longer showing signs of the presence of disease.  A big reason to celebrate.  Those new masses in the left breast though were lighting up as cancerous.  The docs quickly decided to stop the remainder of the Taxol chemotherapy, and made plans for surgery, which is happening tomorrow, July 29th.  After a few weeks of healing and pathology tests on the new masses, a new round of chemotherapy will begin as soon as Sarah has recovered from her masectomy.  Radiation will follow.  So a belt and suspenders approach...get it out of here, zap the body with more chemicals to reduce the chance that any lingering cancer cells are left around, then zap it with radiation, too.  A few weeks have gone by, the masses have grown at an alarming rate, causing Sarah a lot of pain, and we're ready to get this cancer out of here.  The other night we raised a glass to Sarah's left boobie, and the toast went a little something like this:
Sarah: Well, boob, you've been really good to me.
Me: You've been good to me, too, and you've been good to Lena, but it's time for you to go.  It's not you, it's what's inside you.

The surgery is tomorrow.  Nerves are tense, but the overwhelming feeling is one of being ready to knock this cancer out of the universe.

Thanks for all the love, support and prayers.  Please keep them coming.  More to follow...

Plateau??

Let me start by saying sorry that it took so long for an update...  It has been an incredibly busy month.  I want to first celebrate the good news in our lives. Jason was awarded his orthodontic certificate a few weeks ago when he graduated from his residency.  He still has a couple hoops to jump through before he is truly finished with school though.  Remember that written Boards test that was scheduled for April?  Well, that's now set for July 13, and he has to finish a couple of other loose ends, and then he will have a tremendous weight lifted off of his shoulders, and we can bask in the fact that we made it through his residency. We are so very grateful to the director of his program, as he has allowed Jason to balance the end of his residency with all the other happenings that we're dealing with during this battle.

My body has tolerated the Taxol very well over the last several weeks in comparison to the last drugs I was given.  I have the occasional body aches and pains, some grogginess, extreme fatigue, and my new personal favorite: hot flashes.  But, there are no stomach issues, so I'm not having to deal with any more nausea or lack of appetite, which is a huge relief.

My new schedule is to see my oncologist once every three weeks while on the Taxol, so I'm not getting feedback on how the meds are working each week when I go in for a treatment.  The last time I saw her though was last Tuesday, and the report was a bit upsetting.  When I told her that I had been having some pain in my left breast again, she went to examine it, and when measuring the tumor, she said that she was again disappointed with the lack of progress made by the Taxol in the past two weeks since she had last examined it.  Three weeks ago, on June 19th, when she last measured the tumor, it measured at 4.5cm x 5.5cm, and last week on July 2nd, it measured at 5cm x 5.5cm.  I could first freak out and interpret that as a growth, but I'm not.  You have to remember that this is measured with a measuring tape, so lots of room for human error.  Instead, I am looking at this as yet another plateau like the one we had back at the beginning of May.  The doctor was disappointed and concerned that there wasn't more shrinkage, so she said that she wants us to get in and see the breast surgeon before we see her again in two weeks to get another opinion as to how these tumors are responding to the chemotherapy, and whether or not we should stay the course or stop and go straight to surgery.  So as of now, we have an appointment set to see the breast surgeon on July 16th, and then we'll be back to see her the next day, on the 17th.

When leaving her office, my heart sank a bit.  I'm really trying hard to not allow the fear to settle in, and to remain positive, but it can be hard at times.  I remember my doctor's words about how a good response to the chemo makes for a better prognosis...  so the fear is definitely there.  It's just so hard to sit and let the days go by just waiting, and having no control over any of this.

I go tomorrow for my treatment this week, so I am gladly welcoming the intake of medicine, and praying that the meds continue to shrink the tumor.  We won't have any news to report until the 17th after we've seen both doctors, and they've had the chance to discuss everything.

Please continue to pray for us, and continue to send all that great healing energy my way.